The Talk: Safe Sex & Communication

"S-E-X" brings up a lot of questions for the uninitiated and highly experienced too. "Am I ready? Does it hurt? Is it okay to wait? Is birthday sex different from regular sex?" Whoa there, Wellcasters! Put down the pop music and pull up a chair. If you have any questions about sex, well, you're in luck. It's the subject of today's video. If you saw our video on puberty, you'll remember the surge of hormones that hit during the teen and pre-teen years. These raging hormones mean sexual desires come on fast and strong. It's in your biology. But sex is about much more than biology. You have to decide, "Am I ready for sex?" Don't ask me, "How do I know?" According to Planned Parenthood, the average age when people start having sex is about 17. But whether you're 17 or 70, losing your virginity is a personal decision involving everything from emotional readiness to religious beliefs. Regardless of your age, WellCast hopes that your decision-making process involves self-education on contraceptive methods and the risks involved. Tip 1: Sex should never involve pressure from your friends or from your partner. Having sex is a personal decision. Hey, your friends are not going to do the deed for you. On the flip side, don't be the one putting pressure on someone to have sex. Respect your partner's desire to wait, if that's what they want to do. In other words, don't Instagram or tweet your personal business. We guarantee he or she won't retweet that. And contrary to what you might believe, your partner is not going to like you more because you slept with him or her. Sex and love are not synonymous. You know what is? Fornication. Copulation. Hanky-panky. Consummation. Bumpin' uglies. Coitus. Having relations. Making whoopie. Climbing Mount. Seriously guys? Pork-a-lay-la? Pork-a-lay-la? Who says this? Do people say this? Pork-a-lay-la! Tip 2: If you do decide to do the deed, please, please practice safe sex. Listen to me. You can get an STD without intercourse. But thankfully there's very specific protection available for oral sex. Now when it comes to intercourse, you can choose from condoms, the pill, vaginal rings, diaphragms, IUDs, female condoms, and the patch. Why risk an unplanned pregnancy or disease when you have such a delightful menu of options available? Talk to your doctor and ask questions about this stuff. Find out which method makes the most sense for you. That's what they're there for. If you do happen to slip up and have unprotected sex, Plan B is available without a prescription. But there are risks. So what we're saying here, Wellcasters, is Plan B should not be your Plan A. Tip 3: This one is just for the ladies. Prepare for a little bit of pain. For women, first-time sex probably will be a little uncomfortable because biologically most girls are born with a hymen, a thin membrane down there. When a woman loses her virginity through intercourse, she can expect a bit of discomfort and possibly bleeding. If you've ever heard of the term, "pop her cherry," well, that's what this refers to. Guys, you probably won't experience any pain your first time, but both guys and girls should speak to a doctor if there's any unusual pain or discomfort in the nether regions after the magic happens. Tip 4: Make sure your partner is responsible. Besides practicing safe sex between the two of you, has your partner practiced safe sex and been regularly tested in the past? Look, 1 in 2 sexually active young people will get an STD by the time they're 25. So what you don't know can hurt both of you. Hey, get tested together! At the end of the day, there should be clear and open communication, trust, and respect between you and the other party. An open dialogue about desires and concerns means that you can ensure that you feel safe both physically and emotionally with your partner. And that equals good sex. Having sex is a big decision we hope you'll weigh carefully. Don't let one aspect of your life distract you from everything else wonderful you've got going on. And it's totally okay to wait. Well, Wellcasters, we're glad that we had this little chat. If you have more questions, we hope you feel comfortable talking with a parent, family member, doctor, school counselor, coach, or another adult in your life to address further questions. And for even more resources, check out these sites. Ah, well, that's all from me today, Wellcasters. Would you do me a kindness? Subscribe to our channel! Sign up for our newsletter to receive sneak peeks and other awesome stuff. See you later!