How to Leave an Abusive Relationship

First things first, Wellcasters. If, at any time, your safety is in jeopardy, call 9-1-1 or the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE. There's nothing more important than your health and well-being. What do you do if you're in a romantic relationship with somebody who physically, emotionally, or sexually abuses you? It's possible that you don't even recognize the fact that you're being abused. In fact, 28% of young adults have experienced violence in a romantic relationship. Like healthy relationships, abusive relationships have ups and downs. It's easy to write off the bad moments when you're in a good one. However, an abusive relationship is not a normal relationship, and the strategy for ending an abusive relationship is fundamentally different. On today's Wellcast, we're going to show you how to tell if you're in this kind of relationship and how to safely get out of it ASAP. Know this: You're not alone. There's never too deep a hole that you can't pull yourself out of. Help is out there. You just have to recognize that you need it. Step 1. Admit to yourself that you're in an abusive relationship. People often assume that relationships are categorized as abusive only if physical violence is involved. This isn't true. There are many different kinds of abuse, and unhealthy relationships exist on a spectrum. It's not always easy to determine if a relationship you once thought was healthy has crossed the line. Here are a couple of warning signs you should look out for if you suspect that your partner is abusive. We got these from an awesome resource that you should check out: LoveisRespect.org. Do they constantly put you down, especially in front of others? Are they extremely jealous? Do they easily lose their temper? Do they try to keep you away from your friends or family? Do they physically hurt you? Have friends and family members warned you about this person? Step 2. Nobody deserves this. Everyone deserves to be safe. In other words, build your army. Try to spend as little time as possible alone with your abusive partner. Make sure your friends and family know to surround you at this time. Have them call you to check in on you periodically, and always let them know where you're going. You're also pretty emotionally vulnerable right now. Use these people as support. Let them remind you why you should be treated well. You deserve to be in the company of people who actually care about your safety. After all, this situation is not your fault. It has everything to do with your partner's emotional problems, something you cannot even begin to fix. Step 3. Plan a safe breakup. Tell people close to you, family, friends, that you're planning on getting out of this relationship. Be as honest with them as possible, and tell them that you're going to need their help in the coming weeks. Next, figure out how you're going to deliver the news. If you're scared of your partner's reaction, you do not have to do this in person. Again, normal healthy relationship rules do not apply here. If you do decide to meet in person, please bring someone with you and do it in public. This should be a short conversation. Explain that you're leaving, and explain why. Once. It's your decision, not your partner's. Don't change your story, make excuses, or apologize. Then, leave quickly. Take your army. Go do something that makes you feel happy and healthy with the people that you love. Step 4. Turn to someone who's in a position to help you out. There are a lot of great resources out there for this type of situation. Again, you don't have to go through this alone. Reach out to people you trust. All the better if it's someone who has experience or ability to help you. If you're too scared to talk to someone you know, contact one of these three resources. See you later!