Lesson Plan
Unlocking Your Communication Superpowers
Students will be able to use an "I" message to express a feeling or need in a given scenario.
This lesson helps students communicate their feelings and needs clearly and respectfully, reducing misunderstandings and fostering healthier relationships with peers and adults.
Audience
Upper Elementary Students (Grades 3-5)
Time
20 minutes
Approach
Direct instruction, guided practice, and interactive activities.
Prep
Preparation
10 minutes
- Review the Communication Superpowers Slide Deck and ensure all slides are ready.
- Print copies of the "I" Message Formula Worksheet for each student.
- Prepare instructions for the Listening Partner Activity.
- Arrange the classroom for partner work.
Step 1
Introduction to Communication Styles
3 minutes
- Warm-Up Question: Ask students: "What makes it hard to talk to someone when you're upset or want something?" (Brief group share).
2. Introduce Lesson: Explain that today they will learn a 'communication superpower' called "I" messages to help them talk clearly and kindly.
Step 2
"I" Messages Explained
7 minutes
- Present "I" Message Formula: Use the Communication Superpowers Slide Deck to introduce the concept of "I" messages (When you... I feel... because... I need...).
2. Guided Examples: Walk through 2-3 examples with the class, showing how to turn a 'you' statement into an 'I' message.
3. Distribute Worksheet: Hand out the "I" Message Formula Worksheet and work through the first example together as a class.
Step 3
Partner Practice with "I" Messages
7 minutes
- Individual Practice: Give students 2-3 minutes to complete 1-2 scenarios on the "I" Message Formula Worksheet independently.
2. Pair Share: Have students turn to a partner and share their "I" messages from the worksheet. Encourage them to provide feedback to each other on clarity and completeness.
3. Teacher Check-in: Circulate and provide support, clarifying the formula as needed.
Step 4
Wrap-up and Reflection
3 minutes
- Cool-Down Question: Ask students: "How can using 'I' messages help you in school or at home?" (Brief whole-class discussion).
2. Review Key Concept: Briefly recap the "I" message formula and its importance.
3. Challenge: Encourage students to try using an "I" message at least once before the next lesson.
use Lenny to create lessons.
No credit card needed
Slide Deck
Unlocking Your Communication Superpowers!
How do you tell someone how you feel or what you need without causing more problems?
Today, we're learning a secret 'superpower' for clear and kind communication!
Ask students: "What makes it hard to talk to someone when you're upset or want something?" Allow a few students to share their thoughts. Connect their struggles to the idea of needing communication superpowers.
The Problem with "You" Statements
Have you ever said:
- "You always..."
- "You make me..."
- "Why do you...?"
How do these statements usually make others feel?
Explain that sometimes when we're upset, we might say things that sound like blame. "You always take my things!" or "You made me mad!" This often makes the other person defensive. Today's superpower helps us avoid that.
Meet Your Superpower: "I" Messages!
"I" messages help you express:
- What you observe
- How you feel
- Why you feel that way
- What you need
It's all about YOU!
Introduce the concept of "I" messages as a way to own your feelings and your needs, rather than blaming others. Emphasize that it's about you and your experience.
The "I" Message Formula
When you... (state the specific action)
I feel... (name your feeling)
Because... (explain why you feel that way)
I need... (or I would like...) (state what you want to happen)
Present the formula clearly. Read it aloud with the class. Explain each part:
- When you...: Describe the action, not the person.
- I feel...: Name your feeling (e.g., sad, frustrated, confused, happy).
- Because...: Explain why you feel that way (connect it to the action).
- I need... (or I would like...): State what you want to happen.
Let's Practice! Example 1
Scenario: Your classmate keeps interrupting you when you are talking.
"I" Message:
When you ____________ (interrupt me),
I feel ____________ (frustrated),
Because ____________ (I can't finish my thoughts).
I need ____________ (you to let me finish before you speak).
Go through this example together. Ask students to help fill in the blanks using the formula. Original: "You're so annoying when you interrupt me!"
Let's Practice! Example 2
Scenario: Your friend isn't sharing the ball during recess.
"I" Message:
When you ____________ (don't pass the ball),
I feel ____________ (left out),
Because ____________ (I want a turn to play too).
I need ____________ (you to pass the ball sometimes).
Go through this example together. Ask students to help fill in the blanks. Original: "You never play fair with the game!"
Your Turn! Partner Practice
Now, it's time to try out your new superpower!
Work on your "I" Message Formula Worksheet.
When you're ready, share your "I" messages with a partner.
Explain that they will now practice with their "I" Message Formula Worksheet. Walk them through the first problem on the worksheet. Give them 2-3 minutes to complete 1-2 scenarios independently, then ask them to share with a partner. Remind them to be specific and use feeling words.
Reflect and Recharge Your Superpowers!
How can "I" messages help you:
- At school with friends and teachers?
- At home with family?
Keep practicing your communication superpower!
Bring the class back together. Ask: "How can using 'I' messages help you in school or at home?" Facilitate a brief discussion. Remind them that practice makes perfect.
Worksheet
"I" Message Formula Worksheet
Your Communication Superpower: The "I" Message!
Use this formula to clearly and kindly express your feelings and needs:
When you... (state the specific action you observe)
I feel... (name your feeling using a feeling word)
Because... (explain why you feel that way)
I need... (or I would like...) (state what you want to happen)
Practice Scenarios
For each scenario, use the "I" Message formula to write a clear and respectful response. Remember to focus on your own feelings and needs!
Scenario 1:
Your younger sibling takes your toy without asking, and then breaks it.
What you might want to say: "You always break my stuff! You're so annoying!"
Using an "I" Message:
When you _____________________________________________________________________________
I feel ________________________________________________________________________________
Because ____________________________________________________________________________
I need ______________________________________________________________________________
Scenario 2:
During a group project, one classmate isn't doing their share of the work.
What you might want to say: "You're lazy! You never do anything!"
Using an "I" Message:
When you _____________________________________________________________________________
I feel ________________________________________________________________________________
Because ____________________________________________________________________________
I need ______________________________________________________________________________
Scenario 3:
Someone accidentally bumps into you in the hallway, making you drop your books.
What you might want to say: "Watch where you're going! You made me drop everything!"
Using an "I" Message:
When you _____________________________________________________________________________
I feel ________________________________________________________________________________
Because ____________________________________________________________________________
I need ______________________________________________________________________________
Scenario 4:
Your friend keeps making jokes about your new haircut, and it's starting to bother you.
What you might want to say: "Stop making fun of me! You're so mean!"
Using an "I" Message:
When you _____________________________________________________________________________
I feel ________________________________________________________________________________
Because ____________________________________________________________________________
I need ______________________________________________________________________________
Activity
Listening Partner Activity: Hear Me Out!
This activity will help you practice being a good listener, which is just as important as expressing yourself clearly!
How to Play:
-
Find a Partner: You will work in pairs. Decide who is "Speaker A" and who is "Listener B" first.
-
Speaker A's Turn (2 minutes):
- Speaker A will think of a time they had a strong feeling (happy, sad, frustrated, excited) about something that happened at school or home.
- Speaker A will use one "I" message to describe their feeling and what they needed. For example: "When I found out we had no school on Friday, I felt so excited because I love long weekends! I needed to tell someone!"
- After the "I" message, Speaker A can share a little more about the situation for up to 2 minutes. Do not talk about the other person in the situation using "you" statements. Focus on your feelings and experience.
-
Listener B's Job:
- Listen carefully to Speaker A without interrupting.
- Show you are listening by: making eye contact, nodding, and giving encouraging sounds (like "mm-hmm" or "oh").
- When Speaker A is done, Listener B will summarize what they heard. For example: "So, I hear that when there was no school, you felt really excited because you enjoy long weekends and you wanted to share that news."
- Listener B should not give advice, share their own story, or say if Speaker A was right or wrong. Just summarize what was said.
-
Speaker A's Feedback: Speaker A will then say if Listener B's summary was accurate. "Yes, that's exactly right!" or "Almost, but I meant..."
-
Switch Roles (2 minutes each): Now, Listener B becomes Speaker A, and Speaker A becomes Listener B. Repeat the steps above.
Discussion Questions (After the activity):
- What was challenging about being the speaker?
- What was challenging about being the listener?
- How did it feel when your partner truly listened to you?
- Why is active listening an important communication superpower?