Therapeutic Support Strategies
Supporting a friend in distress can feel challenging—but with the right tools, you can offer genuine help while protecting your own well-being. This article introduces three core skills: active listening, empathy, and setting healthy boundaries.
Active Listening
Active listening means giving your full attention to someone who’s speaking, without planning your response while they talk. Key steps:
- Give nonverbal cues. Face your peer, nod, and maintain comfortable eye contact.
- Paraphrase. Repeat back what you heard in your own words: “So you’re feeling overwhelmed because of the upcoming exam?”
- Ask open-ended questions. Encourage more sharing: “What part of studying feels hardest right now?”
- Avoid judgment. Keep an open mind, even if you disagree.
Example: When your friend says, “I’m stressed about trying out for the basketball team,” you might respond, “It sounds like you’re worried you won’t make the cut. Tell me more about what’s on your mind.”
Empathy
Empathy goes beyond listening: it’s tuning in to how someone feels and communicating that understanding. Steps to show empathy:
- Name the emotion. “It seems like you’re feeling discouraged.”
- Validate. “It makes sense to feel that way after all the practice you’ve put in.”
- Share a connection. “I remember feeling nervous before my big music recital. That pressure can be intense.”
Example: If a classmate tells you they’re upset about a family issue, you might say, “I can’t imagine exactly what that’s like, but I’m sorry you’re going through this.”
Setting Healthy Boundaries
While it’s caring to help others, you also need to respect your own limits. Healthy boundaries protect both you and your peer from burnout or emotional overwhelm.
- Recognize your limits. Notice when you feel drained or anxious.
- Communicate kindly. “I want to be here for you, but I have two tests tomorrow. Can we talk after school?”
- Offer alternatives. If you can’t chat right now, suggest another resource: “Have you thought about talking to Mrs. Lopez? She’s really supportive.”
Example: If a friend calls you late at night needing to vent, you might say, “I care about you and want to listen. Can we talk at lunch tomorrow so I can give you my full attention?”
Quick Tips
• Listen first, fix later. Most people want to feel heard before hearing advice.
• Use “I” statements. Speak from your perspective: “I notice…” rather than “You always…”
• Check in with yourself. Helping others feels good, but never at the cost of your own health.
By practicing active listening, empathy, and boundary-setting, you’ll be better equipped to support friends—and build a more caring community in your classroom.
