Boundary Setting Worksheet: Protecting Your Energy

Name: _________________________ Date: _________________________

Part 1: Understanding Your Limits

Think about your daily life as an undergraduate student. What situations, requests, or interactions tend to leave you feeling drained, overwhelmed, or resentful? Reflect on specific examples.

1. Emotional Drains: When do you feel emotionally exhausted or overloaded by others' feelings or demands?
   
   
   
   
   
   

2. Time Drains: What activities or commitments consistently take up more time than you have, or infringe on your personal time (sleep, relaxation, study)?
   
   
   
   
   
   

3. Energy Drains: What interactions or tasks consistently deplete your mental or physical energy?
   
   
   
   
   
   

4. Academic/Social Drains: In your academic or social life, where do you feel pressured to do things you don't want to do, or where do you feel your contributions are taken for granted?
   
   
   
   
   
   

Part 2: Pinpointing Your Boundary Needs

Based on your reflections above, identify specific areas where you need to establish or strengthen boundaries. Think about who is involved and what the boundary would protect.

1. Regarding my time: I need to set a boundary around... (e.g., late-night calls, last-minute requests, over-scheduling)
   
   
   
   
   
   

2. Regarding my energy/emotions: I need to set a boundary around... (e.g., constant venting, taking on others' emotional labor, gossip)
   
   
   
   
   
   

3. Regarding my relationships: I need to set a boundary with... (e.g., a friend, family member, partner, classmate) about...
   
   
   
   
   
   

4. Regarding my academics: I need to set a boundary with... (e.g., group members, study partners, professors) about...
   
   
   
   
   
   

Part 3: Practice Scenarios - Communicating Boundaries

Read the following scenarios and write down how you would communicate a healthy boundary using "I" statements. Be clear, concise, and respectful.

1. Scenario: A friend frequently asks you to proofread their entire essays, often at the last minute, impacting your own study time.
   Your Boundary Statement:
   
   
   
   
   
   

2. Scenario: Your roommate often brings friends over for loud gatherings when you need to study or sleep, despite knowing your schedule.
   Your Boundary Statement:
   
   
   
   
   
   

3. Scenario: A family member calls you multiple times a day expecting long conversations, even when you're in class or busy.
   Your Boundary Statement:
   
   
   
   
   
   

4. Scenario: You're working on a group project, and one member consistently misses meetings and fails to complete their assigned parts, expecting others to cover for them.
   Your Boundary Statement:
   
   
   
   
   
   

Part 4: My Boundary Action Plan

Think about one specific boundary you want to establish or strengthen in the coming week. This is a personal goal, and you don't have to share it unless you choose to.

1. What is the boundary you want to set? (Be specific about what you will or will not tolerate/do.)
   
   
   
   
   
   

2. Who is this boundary with? (e.g., a friend, family member, roommate, classmate, yourself)
   
   
   
   
   
   

3. How will you communicate this boundary? (Write out your exact words or a strategy for how you will express this boundary.)
   
   
   
   
   
   

4. What challenges might you face, and how will you address them? (e.g., guilt,对方的反应, forgetting to enforce)
   
   
   
   
   
   

Discussion Guide: Boundary Scenarios

Group Discussion: Real-World Boundary Challenges

Instructions: In your small groups, discuss each scenario below. For each scenario, consider the following questions:

1. What is the core boundary that needs to be set or strengthened in this situation? (Is it about time, emotional capacity, personal space, etc.?)
2. How would you communicate this boundary effectively? (What specific words or strategies would you use? Think about "I" statements and being clear and respectful.)
3. What potential challenges or reactions might you encounter when setting this boundary?
4. How would you address those challenges or reactions while maintaining your boundary?

Scenario 1: The Late-Night Vent Session

Your close friend frequently calls you late at night (after 11 PM), often to vent about their day for an hour or more. You value your friend, but these calls consistently disrupt your sleep and leave you tired for your morning classes and studies.

Scenario 2: The Project Slack-Off

You are working on a crucial group project for a major course. One member consistently fails to complete their assigned tasks by deadlines, leaving you and other group members to pick up their slack. The final deadline is approaching quickly, and you're feeling overwhelmed and resentful.

Scenario 3: The Overlapping Commitments

You have a demanding academic schedule and also work a part-time job. Your extended family frequently plans gatherings and expects your attendance every weekend, making you feel guilty if you decline. You find yourself constantly exhausted and unable to dedicate sufficient time to your studies or self-care.

Scenario 4: The Constant "Favors"

A classmate, whom you are not particularly close with, has started regularly asking you for favors—like driving them places, lending them money, or doing parts of their homework—each request taking up your time and making you feel taken advantage of.

Scenario 5: The Information Overload

You are part of several student organizations and are on many group chats. Your phone is constantly buzzing with notifications, even late at night, pulling your attention away from studying, relaxing, or sleeping. You feel a constant pressure to respond immediately to everything.