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Grief's Shifting Sands

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Lesson Plan

Riding the Waves of Grief

Participants will understand and acknowledge the non-linear, fluctuating nature of grief, recognizing that emotional intensity can change over time. They will also learn strategies to validate their own and others' grief experiences, fostering a sense of normalcy and reducing isolation.

Understanding grief as a non-linear process helps adults validate their emotions, reduces feelings of confusion or isolation, and normalizes their healing journey. This lesson provides tools for self-compassion and connecting with others who are grieving.

Audience

Adults Group

Time

70 minutes

Approach

Through discussion and reflection, participants will explore the non-linear nature of grief.

Materials

The Unpredictable Journey (slide-deck), Sharing Our Emotional Tides (discussion), and One Word for Today (cool-down)

Prep

Preparation

20 minutes

Step 1

Introduction: Setting the Stage (10 minutes)

10 minutes

  • Welcome participants and introduce the topic: the non-linear nature of grief.
    - Briefly explain the purpose of the session: to understand and validate fluctuating emotions in grief.
    - Set ground rules for a safe and supportive discussion environment.

Step 2

Exploring Grief's Shifting Sands (20 minutes)

20 minutes

  • Present the Slide Deck on the non-linear model of grief.
    - Facilitate a brief initial discussion using prompts from Sharing Our Emotional Tides about personal experiences with fluctuating emotions in grief.

Step 3

Deep Dive: Sharing Our Emotional Tides (30 minutes)

30 minutes

  • Transition to the main small group discussion using the prompts and guidelines in Sharing Our Emotional Tides.
    - Encourage active listening and empathetic responses.
    - Circulate among groups to provide support and guidance.

Step 4

Reflecting and Concluding (10 minutes)

10 minutes

  • Bring the groups back together for a brief whole-group share-out of key takeaways.
    - Distribute the One Word for Today activity as a closing reflection.
    - Summarize the main points about normalizing grief and finding support.
    - Thank participants for their openness and participation.
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Slide Deck

Grief's Shifting Sands

Understanding the Non-Linear Nature of Grief

  • Welcome and Introductions
  • Setting a Safe Space for Sharing
  • What is Grief?

Welcome everyone and introduce the topic of grief. Acknowledge that grief is a personal and often challenging experience.

The Myth of "Stages"

Grief is often depicted as a straight line, moving from one stage to the next.

But what if it's not a straight line at all?

Think about times you've felt like you were 'over' something, only for the feelings to resurface.

Explain that grief is often misunderstood as a linear process with clear stages. Highlight that in reality, it's much more complex.

Grief's True Nature: Shifting Sands

Grief is more like an ocean, with tides that ebb and flow.

  • Non-Linear: There's no set order or timeline.
  • Fluctuating Intensity: Emotions can feel intense one day, and calm the next.
  • Unique to Each Person: Your journey is yours alone.

Introduce the concept of grief as a fluctuating experience. Use the metaphor of shifting sands or waves in the ocean to illustrate the unpredictable nature of emotions.

Riding the Waves of Emotion

It's normal to experience a wide range of emotions, sometimes all in one day:

  • Sadness & Joy
  • Anger & Acceptance
  • Guilt & Relief

These are not contradictions, but a natural part of the process.

Emphasize that it's normal for emotions to come and go, sometimes with surprising intensity. Provide examples of common fluctuations.

The Pressure to "Be Okay"

Society often has expectations about how grief 'should' look.

  • "You should be over it by now."
  • "Time heals all wounds."

These messages can make us feel isolated or like we're grieving 'wrongly'.

Discuss how society often pressures individuals to 'move on' quickly, which can lead to feelings of inadequacy or shame. Reiterate that all feelings are valid.

Validating Our Feelings

How can we be kind to ourselves and others when grief feels unpredictable?

  • Acknowledge: "It's okay to feel this way."
  • Allow: Give yourself permission to feel what you feel.
  • Support: Offer empathy and a listening ear to others.

Encourage participants to practice self-compassion and to validate their own and others' experiences. Discuss the importance of acknowledging feelings without judgment.

Finding Connection

You are not alone in this journey.

Sharing our experiences can:

  • Reduce feelings of isolation.
  • Provide new perspectives.
  • Offer comfort and understanding.

Let's share our emotional tides.

Explain that finding support from others who understand can be incredibly helpful in navigating the non-linear path of grief. Transition to the discussion activity.

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Discussion

Sharing Our Emotional Tides: A Small Group Discussion

Purpose: To provide a safe and supportive space for participants to share their experiences with the non-linear nature of grief and to foster mutual understanding and validation.

Guidelines for Discussion:

  • Listen with Empathy: Focus on understanding, not on fixing or advising.
  • Share from Experience: Use "I" statements. Share what feels comfortable and safe.
  • Confidentiality: What is shared here, stays here.
  • Respect Differences: Everyone's grief journey is unique.

Discussion Prompts:

  1. Think about your own experience with grief. Can you recall a time when you felt like you were doing better, only for intense emotions to return unexpectedly? What was that experience like for you?











  2. The metaphor of "Grief's Shifting Sands" suggests that emotions in grief ebb and flow like the ocean. Does this resonate with your experience? How so?











  3. What are some of the different emotions you've experienced in your grief journey? Have any of them surprised you by their intensity or timing?











  4. How do societal expectations about grief (e.g., "getting over it") impact your ability to openly express your fluctuating emotions?











  5. What has helped you or could help you in acknowledging and validating your own shifting emotions during grief?











  6. How can we better support others who are experiencing the unpredictable journey of grief?











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Cool Down

One Word for Today: Reflecting on Grief's Shifting Sands

Purpose: To provide a brief moment of individual reflection and a sense of shared experience as we conclude our discussion on grief's non-linear nature.

Instructions:

  1. Take a moment to reflect on our discussion about grief's shifting sands and the unpredictable journey of emotions.
  2. Consider how you are feeling right now, or what thought stands out to you from our time together.
  3. On your paper, or silently to yourself, choose ONE WORD that captures your current feeling, a key takeaway, or a new insight you've gained today.

Optional Share-Out: If you feel comfortable, we will go around the circle and each share our one word, without explanation. This is an opportunity to hear from each other and acknowledge our shared humanity in this experience.

My one word for today is:







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