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Friendship Boundaries: A Balancing Act

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Lesson Plan

Friendship Boundaries: A Balancing Act

Students will be able to define personal boundaries, identify types of healthy friendship boundaries, and practice communicating boundaries effectively to foster respectful and supportive relationships.

Understanding and setting healthy boundaries is crucial for developing strong, respectful friendships. It helps students protect their personal space, feelings, and time, preventing misunderstandings and ensuring their relationships are balanced and positive.

Audience

7th Grade

Time

30 minutes

Approach

Discussion, Reflection, Scenario-based learning

Materials

Whiteboard or Projector, Friendship Boundaries Slide Deck, Boundary Scenario Cards, My Friendship Boundaries Worksheet, and Cool Down: Boundary Check-In

Prep

Teacher Preparation

15 minutes

Step 1

Introduction: What are Boundaries?

5 minutes

  • Begin by projecting the first slide of the Friendship Boundaries Slide Deck.
  • Ask students: "What does the word 'boundary' mean to you? Where do you hear it used in everyday life?" (e.g., property boundaries, out-of-bounds in sports).
  • Guide a brief discussion to establish a basic understanding of boundaries.
  • Introduce the concept of personal boundaries, specifically in friendships, using the slide deck.

Step 2

Exploring Friendship Boundaries

10 minutes

  • Transition to the slides on types of friendship boundaries (emotional, physical, time, digital).
  • For each type, provide a brief explanation and ask students for examples they might have experienced or observed.
  • Facilitate an open discussion, encouraging students to share (if comfortable) or think about scenarios where these boundaries are important.
  • Emphasize that boundaries are about self-respect and mutual respect in relationships, not about keeping people out.

Step 3

Scenario Practice: Setting Boundaries

10 minutes

  • Divide students into small groups (3-4 students per group).
  • Distribute one Boundary Scenario Card to each group.
  • Instruct groups to read their scenario and discuss:
    • What boundary is being challenged or needed?
    • How could the person in the scenario effectively communicate their boundary?
    • What might be the positive outcomes of setting this boundary?
  • After 5-7 minutes, bring the class back together and have each group briefly share their scenario and their proposed boundary solution.
  • Facilitate a brief class discussion on the different approaches and their effectiveness.

Step 4

Reflection and Wrap-up

5 minutes

  • Distribute the My Friendship Boundaries Worksheet.
  • Ask students to spend a few minutes reflecting on one boundary they might want to set or better communicate in their own friendships.
  • Conclude the lesson with the Cool Down: Boundary Check-In, asking students to respond to the prompt: "One new thing I learned about friendship boundaries today is..."
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Slide Deck

Friendship Boundaries: A Balancing Act

How do we build strong friendships while respecting ourselves and others?

Welcome students and introduce the topic. Ask them to share what comes to mind when they hear the word 'boundary'. Connect it to everyday examples like property lines or game rules. Explain that today we'll talk about personal boundaries in friendships.

What Are Boundaries?

  • Limits and Expectations: They define what you're comfortable with and what you need from others.
  • Invisible Lines: They protect your feelings, time, and space.
  • Communication is Key: They help others understand how to respect you.

Define what a boundary is in a personal context. Emphasize that it's about limits and expectations for how we want to be treated. Ask for examples of where they might have seen or heard about boundaries (e.g., in movies, between siblings).

Emotional Boundaries

  • What you share: Not feeling pressured to share deeply personal things.
  • Taking on feelings: Not being responsible for a friend's constant sadness or anger.
  • Emotional space: Knowing when you need space to process your own feelings.

Discuss emotional boundaries. Explain that it's about not being overwhelmed by others' feelings or expecting friends to solve all your emotional problems. Encourage students to think about when they might feel emotionally drained in a friendship.

Physical Boundaries

  • Personal space: How close you are comfortable with others being.
  • Touch: What types of touch are okay (e.g., high-fives vs. unwanted hugs).
  • Physical belongings: Respect for your possessions and personal items.

Explain physical boundaries. This isn't just about personal space, but also about touch and physical comfort. Remind students that everyone's comfort level is different and it's important to respect that.

Time Boundaries

  • Availability: When you are (and aren't) free to hang out.
  • Commitments: Respecting your plans with others and your personal time.
  • Priorities: Balancing friendships with school, family, and hobbies.

Talk about time boundaries. This is about managing commitments and knowing it's okay to say 'no' to plans or requests if you're busy or need personal time. Discuss the importance of balancing friendships with other responsibilities.

Digital Boundaries

  • Online communication: Expecting respectful and appropriate messages.
  • Sharing content: Not sharing personal information or photos without permission.
  • Screen time: Respecting when a friend needs a break from their phone or games.

Address digital boundaries, which are increasingly important for this age group. Discuss online communication, sharing content, and screen time. Emphasize digital respect and privacy.

Scenario Practice!

Work in small groups to discuss real-life friendship boundary challenges and how to navigate them effectively.

Introduce the scenario activity. Explain that they will work in groups to read a common friendship situation and discuss how to apply what they've learned about boundaries to resolve it.

Building Stronger Friendships

Setting boundaries isn't about pushing friends away; it's about creating a foundation of mutual respect and understanding that makes friendships stronger and healthier.

Conclude the lesson by reiterating the importance of healthy boundaries for lasting friendships. Give a moment for students to think about one boundary they might want to set. Distribute the worksheet and cool-down.

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Activity

Boundary Scenario Cards

Instructions: Read your assigned scenario with your group. Discuss the questions below and be prepared to share your thoughts with the class.

Scenario 1: The Constant Borrower

Your friend, Alex, always asks to borrow your phone, even when you're using it. Sometimes, Alex even takes your phone without asking to check social media or play games. You feel annoyed and like you don't have personal space, but you don't want to upset Alex.

  • What boundary is being challenged or needed here?
  • How could you effectively communicate your boundary to Alex?
  • What might be the positive outcomes of setting this boundary?

Scenario 2: The Secret Keeper

Your friend, Jamie, tells you a secret about another friend and makes you promise not to tell anyone. Later, you find out that Jamie has told several other people the same secret. Now, Jamie is asking you to keep another secret, and you feel uncomfortable and untrusting.

  • What boundary is being challenged or needed here?
  • How could you effectively communicate your boundary to Jamie?
  • What might be the positive outcomes of setting this boundary?

Scenario 3: The Late Night Texter

Your friend, Chris, often texts you very late at night (past 10 PM) asking to chat or to help them with homework. You need your sleep, and these texts wake you up, but you feel obligated to respond because Chris is your friend.

  • What boundary is being challenged or needed here?
  • How could you effectively communicate your boundary to Chris?
  • What might be the positive outcomes of setting this boundary?

Scenario 4: The Tag-Along

Every time you make plans with another friend or group, your friend Sam assumes they're invited and shows up without being explicitly asked. While you like Sam, sometimes you want to spend time with other friends exclusively or just have some alone time, and you feel like you can't have that with Sam around.

  • What boundary is being challenged or needed here?
  • How could you effectively communicate your boundary to Sam?
  • What might be the positive outcomes of setting this boundary?

Scenario 5: The Over-Sharer

Your friend, Taylor, often shares very personal and sometimes inappropriate details about their family life or other friends with you. You feel uncomfortable hearing these things and worry that Taylor might be sharing your private information with others too.

  • What boundary is being challenged or needed here?
  • How could you effectively communicate your boundary to Taylor?
  • What might be the positive outcomes of setting this boundary?

Scenario 6: The Game Inviter

Your friend, Kai, constantly sends you invites to join online games, even when you've told them you're busy with homework or don't feel like playing. They keep sending invites, and you feel pressured and annoyed.

  • What boundary is being challenged or needed here?
  • How could you effectively communicate your boundary to Kai?
  • What might be the positive outcomes of setting this boundary?
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Worksheet

My Friendship Boundaries Worksheet

Instructions: Reflect on your own friendships and the different types of boundaries we discussed. Answer the questions below thoughtfully.

Part 1: Reflecting on Boundaries

  1. Think about a time when you felt uncomfortable in a friendship, but weren't sure why. Looking back, do you think a boundary might have been crossed or needed?






  2. Which type of boundary (emotional, physical, time, digital) do you think is most important for you personally, and why?






  3. Why is it sometimes hard to set boundaries with friends?






Part 2: Setting a Personal Boundary

Think about one friendship where you might want to set or communicate a boundary more clearly. This doesn't mean the friendship is bad, just that you want to make it healthier and more respectful.

  1. Describe the situation or behavior that makes you feel a boundary is needed.











  2. What specific boundary do you want to set? (Be clear and concise)






  3. How could you communicate this boundary to your friend in a kind and clear way? Write down a few sentences you might say.
    *Example:

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Cool Down

Cool Down: Boundary Check-In

Instructions: Please answer the following questions to reflect on today's lesson.

  1. One new thing I learned about friendship boundaries today is...






  2. One question I still have about setting boundaries in friendships is...






  3. How might understanding friendship boundaries help you in your relationships outside of school?






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