Script: De-escalation Moves

Introduction (Warm-Up)

Teacher: "Good morning/afternoon everyone! Let's kick off our session today with a quick thought experiment. Have you ever been in a situation where a conversation or disagreement started to get really heated, and you wished you could just hit a 'pause button'? Maybe with a friend, a family member, or even here at school?"

(Pause for student responses, acknowledge their experiences.)

Teacher: "It happens to all of us. Sometimes, emotions can run high, and we might say or do things we later regret. Today, we're going to learn some powerful 'de-escalation moves' – techniques to help cool down those heated moments before they get out of hand, making sure everyone feels heard and respected."

Warm-Up: Your 'Pause' Signal (Slide: Your 'Pause' Signal)

Teacher: "To start, let's think about a 'pause signal.' What non-verbal signals or even short phrases do you already use, or could use, to tell someone, 'Hey, I need a moment here' or 'Let's take a breath before this gets worse'?"

(Encourage students to share. Examples might include holding up a hand, taking a deep breath, or simply saying, 'Whoa, let's slow down.')

Teacher: "Excellent ideas! Those are all forms of de-escalation, even if you didn't call it that before. They help us prevent a small spark from becoming a big fire. Now, let's dive into some specific strategies."

De-escalation Move 1: Breathe & Regulate (Slide: Breathe & Regulate)

Teacher: "Our first move is all about you – controlling your own reaction. Think about when you're feeling angry or stressed. What happens to your body?"

(Wait for responses like 'heart races,' 'muscles tense,' 'fast breathing.')

Teacher: "Exactly. Your body is telling you it's time to react! But we want to react calmly and thoughtfully. That's where breathing comes in. It's your superpower! When you take deep breaths, you send a signal to your brain to calm down.

• Demonstrate: "Let's try a quick one together. Breathe in slowly through your nose for a count of four... hold for four... and exhale slowly through your mouth for a count of six. Let's do that two or three times."

(Lead the class in a few deep breaths.)

Teacher: "Notice how that feels? When you're in a tough situation, even just a few deep breaths can help you get centered. This is called self-regulation – managing your own emotions so you can respond, not just react."

De-escalation Move 2: Tone & Space (Slide: Tone & Space)

Teacher: "Next, let's talk about how we sound and how we stand. Words are powerful, but sometimes how we say them and our body language are even more impactful."

• Tone of Voice: "Imagine someone yelling at you. How does that make you feel? Probably defensive, right? Now, imagine someone speaking to you in a calm, low voice, even if they're upset. Which one makes you more likely to listen? Our tone can either throw fuel on the fire or help put it out."
• Body Language: "What about standing super close, pointing, or crossing your arms? Those actions can make someone feel threatened. Instead, what if you take a step back, keep your hands open, and maintain a relaxed posture? That communicates, 'I'm here to talk, not to fight.' We call this giving space, both physically and emotionally."

De-escalation Move 3: Time-Out Signals (Slide: Time-Out Signals)

Teacher: "Our last move brings us back to our warm-up. Sometimes, despite our best efforts with breathing and calm communication, a conversation still needs a full pause. This is where time-out signals come in."

• Verbal Signals: "This could be saying something like, 'I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed, can we talk about this in 10 minutes?' or 'I need a moment to collect my thoughts.' It's about taking responsibility for your feelings and asking for what you need to cool down."
• Non-Verbal Signals: "It could also be a non-verbal cue, like the hand signal we discussed earlier, or simply stepping away briefly if you can do so respectfully. The key is to communicate that you're not avoiding the issue, but rather taking a break to approach it more constructively."
• Agreeing on Signals: "Ideally, with people you interact with often, like friends or family, you can even agree on these signals beforehand. That way, when you use them, the other person understands what's happening and doesn't feel rejected or ignored."

Transition to Activity (Slide: Practice Time: Role-Play Stations)

Teacher: "Now that we've learned these three powerful de-escalation moves – breathing and self-regulation, using calm tone and body language, and employing time-out signals – it's time to put them into practice! The best way to get good at these is to actually do them."

"We're going to break into small groups for some role-playing. Each group will get some Role-Play Station Cards with different scenarios and a De-escalation Checklist to help you give each other feedback. Remember, the goal is to practice two of the techniques we just discussed in each scenario."

(Explain group formation and distribution of materials.)

Teacher: "I'll be circulating to help you out and answer any questions. Have fun practicing these important skills!"

Cool Down (Slide: Your Go-To De-escalation Move!)

Teacher: "Alright everyone, bring it back in! Great work with those role-plays. It's not easy to practice these in front of others, and you all did a fantastic job."

"To wrap things up, I want you to think about what we learned today. Which two de-escalation moves really resonated with you? Which ones do you think you'll try to use first? And where in your life – at home, with friends, at school – do you imagine these moves could be most helpful?"

"I'm handing out an Exit Ticket: My Go-To Move. Please take a few minutes to complete it. If you'd like to share your thoughts with the class, we'll have a moment for that before we finish."

(Collect exit tickets.)

Teacher: "Remember, de-escalation isn't about avoiding conflict; it's about handling it in a way that leads to better understanding and solutions, instead of just more anger. Keep practicing these moves, and you'll be a conflict-cooling pro in no time!"

Role-Play Station Cards

Instructions: In your small groups, pick a card and assign roles: one person practices de-escalation, one acts out the scenario, and one observes using the De-escalation Checklist. Practice using at least TWO de-escalation techniques. Switch roles so everyone gets a chance to practice!

Scenario 1: The Frustrated Group Member

Situation: You and a classmate are working on a group project. Your classmate is getting increasingly frustrated because they feel like their ideas aren't being heard, and they keep interrupting you and speaking in a sharp tone. Their face is red, and they're starting to raise their voice.

Your Goal: Calm the situation down so you can both continue working productively. What de-escalation moves will you use?

Scenario 2: The Accusation

Situation: During lunch, a friend confronts you, accusing you loudly of spreading a rumor about them that you didn't spread. They are standing close to you, and their voice is rising. Other students are starting to look over.

Your Goal: Respond calmly and try to understand their perspective without getting defensive or escalating the conflict. What de-escalation moves will you use?

Scenario 3: The Annoying Sibling/Friend

Situation: You're trying to concentrate on your homework/chores at home, but your younger sibling (or a friend who is visiting) keeps making loud noises, bothering you, and ignoring your requests to stop. You're starting to feel really irritated, and you can feel your own temper rising.

Your Goal: Address the situation without yelling or creating a bigger argument. How can you de-escalate your own feelings and get them to understand? What de-escalation moves will you use?

De-escalation Checklist

Student Name(s): ____________________________

Observer Name: _____________________________

Instructions: As you observe your classmate(s) practicing de-escalation, use this checklist to provide feedback. Mark "Yes" if you observed the technique used effectively, "Needs Practice" if it was attempted but could be improved, or "Not Observed" if it wasn't used. Provide specific comments to help your partner improve!

Section 1: Self-Regulation (Breathe & Regulate)

Section 2: Tone & Space

Section 3: Time-Out Signals

Overall Feedback

• What did your partner do well in de-escalating the situation?
  
  
  
  
  
  
• What is one suggestion for improvement?
  
  
  
  
  
  
• Which de-escalation technique did they use most effectively?
  
  
  
  
  
  

Exit Ticket: My Go-To De-escalation Move

Name: ____________________________

Instructions: Reflect on the de-escalation techniques we discussed and practiced today. Answer the questions below to identify your personal de-escalation strategy.

Question 1: My Two Go-To Moves

Out of the de-escalation techniques we learned (Breathing/Self-Regulation, Tone & Space, Time-Out Signals), which two do you think you will try to use the most? Why do these two resonate with you?

Question 2: Where I'll Use Them

Think about a specific situation or place (e.g., at home, with friends, during a group project, online) where you could use these two de-escalation moves. Describe the situation and how you would apply your chosen techniques.

Question 3: One Thing I Learned

What is one new thing you learned about managing conflict or your own reactions today?

Script: De-escalation Moves

Introduction (Warm-Up)

Teacher: "Good morning/afternoon everyone! Let's kick off our session today with a quick thought experiment. Have you ever been in a situation where a conversation or disagreement started to get really heated, and you wished you could just hit a 'pause button'? Maybe with a friend, a family member, or even here at school?"

(Pause for student responses, acknowledge their experiences.)

Teacher: "It happens to all of us. Sometimes, emotions can run high, and we might say or do things we later regret. Today, we're going to learn some powerful 'de-escalation moves' – techniques to help cool down those heated moments before they get out of hand, making sure everyone feels heard and respected."

Warm-Up: Your 'Pause' Signal (Slide: Your 'Pause' Signal)

Teacher: "To start, let's think about a 'pause signal.' What non-verbal signals or even short phrases do you already use, or could use, to tell someone, 'Hey, I need a moment here' or 'Let's take a breath before this gets worse'?"

(Encourage students to share. Examples might include holding up a hand, taking a deep breath, or simply saying, 'Whoa, let's slow down.')

Teacher: "Excellent ideas! Those are all forms of de-escalation, even if you didn't call it that before. They help us prevent a small spark from becoming a big fire. Now, let's dive into some specific strategies."

De-escalation Move 1: Breathe & Regulate (Slide: Breathe & Regulate)

Teacher: "Our first move is all about you – controlling your own reaction. Think about when you're feeling angry or stressed. What happens to your body?"

(Wait for responses like 'heart races,' 'muscles tense,' 'fast breathing.')

Teacher: "Exactly. Your body is telling you it's time to react! But we want to react calmly and thoughtfully. That's where breathing comes in. It's your superpower! When you take deep breaths, you send a signal to your brain to calm down.

• Demonstrate: "Let's try a quick one together. Breathe in slowly through your nose for a count of four... hold for four... and exhale slowly through your mouth for a count of six. Let's do that two or three times."

(Lead the class in a few deep breaths.)

Teacher: "Notice how that feels? When you're in a tough situation, even just a few deep breaths can help you get centered. This is called self-regulation – managing your own emotions so you can respond, not just react."

De-escalation Move 2: Tone & Space (Slide: Tone & Space)

Teacher: "Next, let's talk about how we sound and how we stand. Words are powerful, but sometimes how we say them and our body language are even more impactful."

• Tone of Voice: "Imagine someone yelling at you. How does that make you feel? Probably defensive, right? Now, imagine someone speaking to you in a calm, low voice, even if they're upset. Which one makes you more likely to listen? Our tone can either throw fuel on the fire or help put it out."
• Body Language: "What about standing super close, pointing, or crossing your arms? Those actions can make someone feel threatened. Instead, what if you take a step back, keep your hands open, and maintain a relaxed posture? That communicates, 'I'm here to talk, not to fight.' We call this giving space, both physically and emotionally."

De-escalation Move 3: Time-Out Signals (Slide: Time-Out Signals)

Teacher: "Our last move brings us back to our warm-up. Sometimes, despite our best efforts with breathing and calm communication, a conversation still needs a full pause. This is where time-out signals come in."

• Verbal Signals: "This could be saying something like, 'I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed, can we talk about this in 10 minutes?' or 'I need a moment to collect my thoughts.' It's about taking responsibility for your feelings and asking for what you need to cool down."
• Non-Verbal Signals: "It could also be a non-verbal cue, like the hand signal we discussed earlier, or simply stepping away briefly if you can do so respectfully. The key is to communicate that you're not avoiding the issue, but rather taking a break to approach it more constructively."
• Agreeing on Signals: "Ideally, with people you interact with often, like friends or family, you can even agree on these signals beforehand. That way, when you use them, the other person understands what's happening and doesn't feel rejected or ignored."

Transition to Activity (Slide: Practice Time: Role-Play Stations)

Teacher: "Now that we've learned these three powerful de-escalation moves – breathing and self-regulation, using calm tone and body language, and employing time-out signals – it's time to put them into practice! The best way to get good at these is to actually do them."

"We're going to break into small groups for some role-playing. Each group will get some Role-Play Station Cards with different scenarios and a De-escalation Checklist to help you give each other feedback. Remember, the goal is to practice two of the techniques we just discussed in each scenario."

(Explain group formation and distribution of materials.)

Teacher: "I'll be circulating to help you out and answer any questions. Have fun practicing these important skills!"

Cool Down (Slide: Your Go-To De-escalation Move!)

Teacher: "Alright everyone, bring it back in! Great work with those role-plays. It's not easy to practice these in front of others, and you all did a fantastic job."

"To wrap things up, I want you to think about what we learned today. Which two de-escalation moves really resonated with you? Which ones do you think you'll try to use first? And where in your life – at home, with friends, at school – do you imagine these moves could be most helpful?"

"I'm handing out an Exit Ticket: My Go-To Move. Please take a few minutes to complete it. If you'd like to share your thoughts with the class, we'll have a moment for that before we finish."

(Collect exit tickets.)

Teacher: "Remember, de-escalation isn't about avoiding conflict; it's about handling it in a way that leads to better understanding and solutions, instead of just more anger. Keep practicing these moves, and you'll be a conflict-cooling pro in no time!"