Boundary Builders: Defining Your Personal Space - Teacher Script

Introduction: What are Boundaries? (10 minutes)

(Display Boundary Builders Slide Deck - Slide 1)

"Good morning/afternoon, everyone! Today, we're going to become 'Boundary Builders.' This lesson is all about understanding something really important for how we interact with others and how we feel about ourselves: personal boundaries.

First, take a look at our title slide. When you hear the phrase 'personal space,' what comes to mind? Shout out some ideas!"

(Allow students to share, guide towards physical space initially.)

"Great ideas! Personal space is definitely part of it. But what if I told you that personal boundaries are like invisible fences, not just around your body, but around your feelings, your time, and even your online life?"

(Display Boundary Builders Slide Deck - Slide 2)

"As you can see on this slide, boundaries help us decide what we are comfortable with and what we are not. They are the rules we set for ourselves in our relationships.

Why do you think having these 'invisible fences' or rules might be important? What could happen if we didn't have them?"

(Facilitate a short discussion, prompting students to think about comfort, safety, and respect.)

"Exactly! Boundaries are super important for a lot of reasons."

(Display Boundary Builders Slide Deck - Slide 3)

"They protect our feelings, show we respect ourselves, help us build healthier relationships, and let us communicate our needs clearly. Today, we'll dive into three main types: Physical, Emotional, and Digital Boundaries."

Types of Boundaries (15 minutes)

"Let's break down these different types of boundaries. It's helpful to understand them so we can recognize them in our own lives and in the lives of others."

(Display Boundary Builders Slide Deck - Slide 4)

"First, Physical Boundaries. These are all about your body and your personal space. Think about it: How close is too close when someone is standing next to you? Who are you comfortable with touching you, and how? What about your personal belongings or your space at home, like your room?"

"Why do you think it's important to have control over your physical space and who touches you?"

(Allow a few students to share.)

"It's about feeling safe and comfortable in our own skin, right?"

(Display Boundary Builders Slide Deck - Slide 5)

"Next, Emotional Boundaries. These are about your feelings, your thoughts, and personal information. For example, do you always feel like sharing every single thought or secret with everyone? Sometimes we might not want to. Or what if someone else is in a bad mood and tries to make you feel bad too? An emotional boundary helps you protect your own feelings."

"When might someone accidentally or intentionally cross an emotional boundary?"

(Allow a few students to share examples like someone making fun of feelings, pressuring to share secrets, or not respecting privacy.)

(Display Boundary Builders Slide Deck - Slide 6)

"Finally, Digital Boundaries. These are a newer, but super important, type of boundary in our world today. They're all about your online life and how you use technology. Think about sharing photos or personal information online – who gets to see it? What about screen time limits you or your parents set? Or feeling pressured to respond to messages immediately?"

"How are digital boundaries similar to, or different from, physical or emotional boundaries?"

(Allow a few students to share. Guide them to see similarities in respect and comfort, but differences in the medium.)

"Excellent thinking! Now that we know the different types, let's start brainstorming our own. I'm going to hand out the Boundary Brainstorm Worksheet. On this worksheet, you'll have space to write down examples of each type of boundary that are important to you. Take about 10 minutes to work on this independently."

(Distribute Boundary Brainstorm Worksheet. Circulate and assist students as they work.)

Boundary Scenario Cards Activity (20 minutes)

"Alright, let's take what we've learned and put it into practice. We're going to do an activity called Boundary Scenario Cards Activity. I'm going to divide you into small groups."

(Divide students into groups of 3-4.)

"Each group will get a few scenario cards. Your task is to read each scenario, discuss what boundaries might be involved, and most importantly, how the characters in the scenario could respectfully communicate their boundaries or how someone could respectfully react to a boundary being set. Remember to think about what kind of boundary it is – physical, emotional, or digital."

"You'll have about 15 minutes to discuss your scenarios in your groups. Be ready to share one scenario and your group's thoughts with the class."

(Distribute Boundary Scenario Cards Activity to each group. Circulate and listen to group discussions, offering guidance as needed.)

"Okay, class, let's bring it back together. Who would like to share one of their scenarios and what your group discussed about setting or respecting boundaries in that situation?"

(Facilitate sharing from a few groups. Use the Respectful Communication Discussion Guide to prompt deeper thinking and ensure key points about respectful communication are covered.)

Respectful Communication & Wrap-Up (10 minutes)

"Those were excellent discussions! It's clear that communicating boundaries effectively is key. Let's look at some core ideas."

(Display Boundary Builders Slide Deck - Slide 7)

"As you see here, when you're communicating your boundaries, it's important to be clear and direct. Use 'I' statements like, 'I need some space right now,' or 'I don't feel comfortable sharing that photo.' It's also vital to be respectful and firm. And remember, it is absolutely okay to say NO! Your feelings and your comfort are important."

(Display Boundary Builders Slide Deck - Slide 8)

"Now, boundaries aren't just about what you need; they're also about respecting what others need. It's a two-way street! When someone tells you their boundary, it's important to listen, accept their 'no' gracefully, and not push or pressure them. If you accidentally cross someone's boundary, it's always good to apologize and learn from it."

"What happens if we don't respect someone else's boundaries? What are the possible consequences?"

(Facilitate a brief class discussion, emphasizing consequences like damaged trust, hurt feelings, or broken friendships.)

"Exactly. Respect is at the heart of it all."

(Display Boundary Builders Slide Deck - Slide 9)

"Today, you've all been amazing Boundary Builders! You now have the tools to understand different types of boundaries, set your own, communicate them respectfully, and respect the boundaries of others. These skills will help you build stronger, healthier, and happier relationships with everyone in your life.

For homework, please complete any remaining questions on your Boundary Brainstorm Worksheet. Thank you, everyone!"

Boundary Brainstorm: My Personal Space

Instructions: For each type of boundary, read the examples and then think of 2-3 of your own personal boundaries. How would you explain these boundaries to someone else? Remember, your boundaries are unique to you!

1. Physical Boundaries

These boundaries are about your body and your personal space. They help you feel safe and comfortable in your physical environment.

Examples:

• Not wanting people to touch your hair without asking.
• Needing a certain amount of space around you when you are sitting or standing.
• Not wanting people to go through your backpack or locker without permission.

My Physical Boundaries:

2. Emotional Boundaries

These boundaries protect your feelings, thoughts, and personal information. They help you decide what you are willing to share and how you want to be treated emotionally.

Examples:

• Not wanting to talk about a personal family matter with friends.
• Asking someone not to yell at you when they are angry.
• Feeling uncomfortable when someone tries to make you feel guilty for their choices.

My Emotional Boundaries:

3. Digital Boundaries

These boundaries relate to your online interactions, social media, and technology use. They help you manage your digital life in a way that feels safe and healthy.

Examples:

• Not wanting friends to post pictures of you online without your permission.
• Setting limits on how much time you spend on video games or social media.
• Not feeling obligated to respond to messages immediately, especially late at night.

My Digital Boundaries:

Reflection Question:

Why is it important to know your own boundaries and to also respect the boundaries of others? What happens when boundaries are not respected?

Boundary Scenario Cards: What Would You Do?

Instructions for your group:

1. Read each scenario card carefully.
2. Discuss with your group: What type of boundary (physical, emotional, digital) is involved?
3. How could the person whose boundary is being crossed respectfully communicate their boundary?
4. How could the other person respectfully respond?
5. Be ready to share your discussion with the class!

Scenario 1: The Constant Hugger

Your friend, Alex, is a very huggy person. While you sometimes don't mind a hug, Alex often comes up and gives you big bear hugs without asking, even when you're not in the mood or are feeling a bit shy. You feel uncomfortable but don't want to hurt Alex's feelings.

• What type of boundary is this?
• What could you say to Alex to communicate your boundary respectfully?
• How should Alex respond if you set this boundary?

Scenario 2: Secret Pressure

Your friend, Sam, found out a secret about another classmate and is pressuring you to share it with everyone in your social group. You know it would deeply hurt the classmate if the secret got out, and you feel uncomfortable spreading rumors.

• What type of boundary is this?
• What could you say to Sam to communicate your boundary and discomfort?
• How should Sam respond to your decision?

Scenario 3: Photo Share Surprise

Your best friend, Jamie, took a funny but slightly embarrassing photo of you at a party last weekend. Without asking you, Jamie posted it on social media with a funny caption. You saw it and immediately felt embarrassed and upset that it was shared without your permission.

• What type of boundary is this?
• What steps could you take to communicate your boundary to Jamie?
• What should Jamie do after hearing your boundary?

Scenario 4: The Borrowing Buddy

Every day at lunch, your classmate, Chris, asks to borrow your pens, pencils, or even snacks without asking first. Sometimes Chris doesn't return them, or finishes your snack without a thought. You're starting to get annoyed because you feel like your things aren't respected.

• What type of boundary is this?
• How can you set a clear boundary with Chris about your belongings?
• What would be a respectful reaction from Chris?

Scenario 5: Group Chat Overload

Your class has a group chat for school projects, but lately, some friends are using it to send dozens of memes and chat late into the night. Your phone keeps buzzing, and it's distracting you from homework and even waking you up. You like your friends, but the constant notifications are too much.

• What type of boundary is this?
• How can you communicate your need for a quieter group chat, or less notifications, to your friends?
• What are some ways your friends could respect this boundary?

Respectful Communication Discussion Guide

Purpose: This guide is designed to help facilitate a class discussion following the Boundary Scenario Cards Activity, focusing on the importance of respectful communication when setting and respecting personal boundaries.

Discussion Questions:

1. Opening Question: Thinking about the scenarios we just discussed, what were some common challenges you noticed when people tried to set a boundary, or when they reacted to someone else's boundary?
   
   
   
   

2. What does it mean to be respectful? When we talk about communicating boundaries respectfully, what does that actually look like and sound like? What are some words or actions that show respect when you're setting a boundary or when someone is setting one with you?
   
   
   
   
   
   
   

3. **