Teacher Script: Aggression vs. Assertiveness

Introduction: What Does Aggression Look Like? (5 minutes)

(Teacher): "Hi [Student Name]! Thanks for coming today. We're going to talk about something super important that can help you feel more confident and get along even better with your friends and family."

"To start, when someone is being aggressive, what does that usually look like to you? What kind of actions do you see?"

(Teacher): "Those are great observations! Often, when we think of aggression, we think about anger or fighting. But did you know that people can sometimes act aggressively without even being angry? It's true! Sometimes, people might interrupt others a lot, or try to take over a game, or even be a little too pushy, and they don't even realize it's making others feel uncomfortable or unheard."

"Today, we're going to learn about the difference between being aggressive and being assertive, especially when you're not even feeling angry! It's about how we communicate and interact with others every day."

Understanding Aggression vs. Assertiveness (Slides) (10 minutes)

(Teacher): "Let's dive deeper into this using our Lesson Slides: Aggression vs. Assertiveness."

(Teacher, pointing to Slide 2: What is Aggression (Without Anger)?): "Look at this slide. We've talked about some of these. Can you think of a time when someone, maybe even yourself, did something like this without trying to be mean? Like maybe you were really excited about an idea and kept interrupting your friend?"

(Teacher): "It's easy to do, right? The key here is that even if we don't mean to be aggressive, our actions can still affect how others feel. It's not about being a 'bad' person, but about understanding how our actions come across."

(Teacher, pointing to Slide 3: What is Assertiveness?): "Now, let's look at a different way to communicate: assertiveness. Read these points about assertiveness. What stands out to you?"

(Teacher): "Exactly! Assertiveness is about being strong and clear in what you say, but always in a way that is respectful to both yourself and others. It's like finding a balance. You get your voice heard, but you also make sure others feel heard too."

(Teacher, pointing to Slide 4: Key Differences): "This slide really helps put it all together. Aggression, even without anger, tends to dominate – it pushes for your way. Assertiveness, on the other hand, communicates – it expresses your needs while also respecting others."

"Can you think of a time you wished you could have been more assertive instead of perhaps accidentally being a bit aggressive, or maybe even too passive and not speaking up at all?"

Scenario Practice: Choose Your Response (10 minutes)

(Teacher): "Now it's time to put our new understanding into practice! I have some Scenario Cards here. I'm going to read a scenario, and I want you to tell me if the behavior described sounds more aggressive or assertive. Then, we'll think about how you could respond assertively in that situation."

(Teacher, picks up a scenario card): "Here's the first one: You're playing a board game with a friend, and they keep moving your pieces for you, saying they know a 'better strategy' even after you've asked them to stop."

"Is your friend's behavior aggressive or assertive? Why?"

(Teacher): "That's right, it's aggressive, even if they think they're helping! Now, how could you respond assertively in this situation? What could you say or do to express your feelings and needs clearly but respectfully?"

(Teacher): "Fantastic! That's a perfect assertive response. You're being clear, you're standing up for yourself, and you're doing it in a calm way."

(Teacher, repeats with 1-2 more scenarios): "Let's try another one..."

(Guide through more scenarios, providing feedback and prompting for assertive responses.)

Cool Down: Your Turn to Be Assertive (5 minutes)

(Teacher): "You've done a great job today thinking about these important ideas. Being assertive is a skill that takes practice, just like riding a bike or playing an instrument."

"I have this Assertive Communication Worksheet for you to take with you. It has some prompts to help you think about how you can use these skills in your own life and practice being assertive every day."

"Before we finish, I have one last question for you: What is one new thing you learned about being assertive today that you want to try this week?"

(Teacher): "That's wonderful! Remember, being assertive helps you communicate clearly, get your needs met, and build stronger, healthier friendships. Keep practicing, and I know you'll become a master of assertive communication!"

Scenario Cards: Aggression vs. Assertiveness

Cut out each scenario card.

Scenario Card 1

You are playing a board game with a friend. They keep reaching over and moving your game pieces for you, saying, "I know a better way to play!" even after you've asked them to stop politely once.

Question: Is your friend's behavior aggressive or assertive? Why?

Question: How could you respond assertively?

Scenario Card 2

You are excitedly telling your group of friends about your weekend. One friend keeps interrupting you, talking loudly over your story to share their own news.

Question: Is your friend's behavior aggressive or assertive? Why?

Question: How could you respond assertively?

Scenario Card 3

A classmate often borrows your pencils without asking. Today, they took your favorite mechanical pencil from your desk and accidentally broke it, then shrugged and said, "Oops, oh well."

Question: Is your classmate's behavior aggressive or assertive? Why?

Question: How could you respond assertively?

Scenario Card 4

Your older sibling always changes the TV show to what they want to watch, even when you were watching something first and it's your turn. They just grab the remote without a word.

Question: Is your sibling's behavior aggressive or assertive? Why?

Question: How could you respond assertively?

Scenario Card 5

You're working on a group project, and one member always takes charge, assigns everyone tasks without asking for input, and tells people their ideas are

Assertive Communication Worksheet

Name: ________________________

Part 1: Aggressive or Assertive?

Read each statement. Circle "Aggressive" or "Assertive" to show if the person is being aggressive (even if not angry) or assertive.

1. "Move! I need to get by!" (Said loudly, pushing someone aside)
   Aggressive / Assertive

2. "Excuse me, could you please move? I need to get by." (Said calmly and politely)
   Aggressive / Assertive

3. Taking a toy from a friend because you want to play with it now.
   Aggressive / Assertive

4. Saying, "Can I please have a turn with that toy in five minutes?"
   Aggressive / Assertive

5. Interrupting someone to tell your own story because it's more exciting.
   Aggressive / Assertive

6. Waiting for a pause, then saying, "That reminds me, I have something similar to share when you're done!"
   Aggressive / Assertive

Part 2: Your Assertive Voice

Think about a time recently when you wished you had spoken up for yourself, or when you might have accidentally been a little too pushy. Describe the situation and then write what you could say or do assertively.

Situation:

What I could say or do assertively:

Part 3: Practice Assertive Sentences

Complete these sentences using an assertive statement. Remember to be clear and respectful!

1. When my friend takes my things without asking, I can say: "I feel ________ when you ________, please ________."
   
   
   
   

2. If someone talks over me, I can say: "Excuse me, I wasn't ________, I would like to ________."
   
   
   
   

3. If I need help, I can say: "Could you please ________? I need help with ________."
   
   
   
   

4. When I want to say no to something I don't want to do, I can say: "No, thank you. I ________."
   
   
   
   

Part 4: Draw it Out!

Draw a picture of yourself being assertive in a situation. What does your body language look like? What expression is on your face?

Cool Down: Assertiveness Reflection

Name: ________________________

1. What is one big difference between being aggressive and being assertive?
   
   
   
   

2. Think of one situation where you can try to be more assertive this week. What will you say or do?
   
   
   
   

3. On a scale of 1 to 5, how confident do you feel about using assertive communication (1 = not confident at all, 5 = very confident)?
   Circle one:   1   2   3   4   5