Warm Up: Texting Tension Tally

Think about a time you either:

1. Misunderstood a text message someone sent you, OR
2. Someone misunderstood a text message YOU sent them.

How did that make you feel? What happened?

Text Troubles: Resolve! - Teacher Script

Warm Up: Texting Tension Tally (3 minutes)

"Good morning/afternoon, everyone! To kick things off today, let's do a quick warm-up called 'Texting Tension Tally.' I want you to think about a time you either misunderstood a text message someone sent you, or someone misunderstood a text message YOU sent them. How did that make you feel? What happened? Take a moment to jot down your thoughts in the space provided on your Warm Up: Texting Tension Tally sheet.


"

(Allow students about 1 minute to reflect and write. Then, invite a few to share their experiences, emphasizing that these situations are common and relatable.)

"Thanks for sharing! It sounds like many of us have been there. It can be really tricky, right? That brings us to our lesson today.

Introduction: Why Text Troubles Happen (2 minutes)

(Display Slide Deck: Text Troubles: Resolve! - Slide 2: "Texts & Tone: What's Missing?")

"Today, we're going to talk about something really important for your friendships, especially now that so much of our communication happens on our phones. We're going to learn how to resolve conflicts, particularly those that start in text messages. As our warm-up showed, texts can cause trouble because, as this slide highlights, they're missing a lot of important information like tone of voice, facial expressions, and body language. When you're talking face-to-face, you can see if someone is joking or serious, but in a text, it's just words on a screen."

"Has anyone ever misinterpreted a text message? Or had someone misinterpret yours? How did it make you feel? What happened? (Listen to 1-2 student responses)."

The A-B-C's of Conflict Resolution (Activity) (5 minutes)

(Display Slide Deck: Text Troubles: Resolve! - Slide 3: "The A-B-C's of Conflict Resolution")

"To help us navigate these tricky text situations, we're going to learn the 'A-B-C's of Conflict Resolution.' It's a simple way to remember how to handle misunderstandings and disagreements in a healthy way."

(Display Slide Deck: Text Troubles: Resolve! - Slide 4: "A: Ask for Clarity")

"'A' stands for Ask for Clarity. This means instead of just assuming what someone meant by a text, especially if it felt hurtful or confusing, you ask them. Don't stew over it, don't jump to conclusions, just ask! It's like being a detective for meaning. For example, if a friend texts something that makes you frown, you could say: 'What did you mean by that text?' or 'I'm a little confused by your text. Can you explain?' or 'I felt [hurt/confused/sad] when I read that. Is that what you intended?' This gives your friend a chance to explain themselves."

(Display Slide Deck: Text Troubles: Resolve! - Slide 5: "B: Be Calm")

"'B' is for Be Calm. When you get a text that upsets you, your first reaction might be to text back immediately with angry emojis or strong words. But it's really hard to think clearly when you're upset! So, before you respond, take a deep breath. Count to ten. Maybe even step away from your phone for a few minutes. Give yourself time to cool down. You'll be able to communicate much more effectively if you're calm."

(Display Slide Deck: Text Troubles: Resolve! - Slide 6: "C: Choose Words Carefully")

"And finally, 'C' is for Choose Words Carefully. Once you're calm and ready to respond, think about what you want to say. The best way to share your feelings without making your friend feel attacked is to use 'I' statements. Instead of saying, 'You always make mean comments in the group chat,' which sounds like blaming, you could say, 'I felt hurt when I read that comment in the group chat.' This focuses on your feelings and opens the door for a conversation, rather than a fight."

"Let's think about our lunch situation. Imagine the group text comment happened. Instead of getting into a verbal altercation at lunch, how might you use the 'A-B-C's? What would 'asking for clarity' look like in that moment? How would you 'be calm'? What 'words' would you 'carefully choose'? (Guide students through a brief, hypothetical re-enactment or discussion of how they would apply the steps to the conflict they experienced)."

Friendship Fix-Up Worksheet (3 minutes)

"Now, I'm going to hand out this Worksheet: Friendship Fix-Up. You'll work together as a group on this. I want you to read the scenarios and use our A-B-C's to brainstorm how you would respond in a healthy way. This is a chance to practice applying what we just learned to different situations that might come up with your friends."

(Distribute the worksheets. Circulate among the group, offering guidance and encouragement as they work. Remind them to think about 'Ask, Be Calm, Choose words carefully.')

Cool Down: One-Word Resolution (2 minutes)

(Display Slide Deck: Text Troubles: Resolve! - Slide 7: "Friendship Power-Up!")

"Alright everyone, let's wrap up with a quick 'One-Word Resolution' cool-down. Thinking about everything we discussed today – the A-B-C's, how texts can be tricky, and the importance of healthy communication – I want each of you to share one word that represents what you learned or how you feel about resolving conflicts after this session. It could be 'calm,' 'ask,' 'clear,' 'strong,' 'hopeful,' anything that comes to mind."

(Collect the worksheets as an informal assessment.)

"Thank you all for your thoughtful participation today! Remember these A-B-C's – they're powerful tools for keeping your friendships strong and healthy, both online and in person. You've got this!"

Friendship Fix-Up: Applying the A-B-C's

Remember the A-B-C's of Conflict Resolution?

• Ask for clarity
• Be calm
• Choose your words carefully

Work with your group to think about how you would use the A-B-C's in the following situations. Write down your ideas!

Scenario 1: The Emoji Mystery

Your friend, Alex, posts a picture of you both on social media with a caption that has a strange emoji you don't understand, and it makes you feel a little left out or confused. You're not sure if it's a joke or something else.

How would you Ask for clarity?

How would you Be calm before responding?

How would you Choose your words carefully when you talk to Alex?

Scenario 2: Group Chat Gaffe

In your friend group chat, another friend, Sam, sends a message that seems to be a slight jab at something you said earlier, but they don't use your name. You feel a little hurt and targeted, but you're not 100% sure it was about you.

How would you Ask for clarity?

How would you Be calm before responding?

How would you Choose your words carefully when you address Sam or the group?

Cool Down: One-Word Resolution

Think about everything we discussed today about resolving text troubles and using the A-B-C's.

What ONE WORD best describes what you learned or how you feel about handling conflicts now?

Parent Guide: Text Talk Troubles - Helping Your Child Navigate Digital Conflicts

Dear Parents,

In today's digital world, text messages are a huge part of how our children connect with their friends. While texting can be fun and convenient, it often lacks the important clues we get from face-to-face conversations, like tone of voice and body language. This can easily lead to misunderstandings and conflicts among friends, as we recently addressed with your children in a small group session.

To help your child navigate these "text troubles" and maintain healthy friendships, we introduced a simple framework called the A-B-C's of Conflict Resolution for digital interactions:

A: Ask for Clarity

Encourage your child not to jump to conclusions when a text message feels confusing or hurtful. Instead, teach them to ask for clarification. This could sound like:

• "What did you mean by that text?"
• "I'm a little confused by your message. Can you explain more?"
• "I felt [emotion] when I read that. Is that what you intended to say?"

Parent Tip: Role-play different scenarios with your child. Ask them how they would clarify a confusing text from a friend.

B: Be Calm

When emotions run high, it's easy to fire off a quick, angry response. Help your child understand the importance of being calm before replying to an upsetting text. Suggest strategies like:

• Taking a few deep breaths.
• Stepping away from their phone for a few minutes or even an hour.
• Talking to a trusted adult about the situation before responding.

Parent Tip: Discuss with your child the idea of a "digital pause" – taking a break from the screen when upset to collect their thoughts.

C: Choose Words Carefully

Once calm, guide your child to choose their words carefully. Encourage the use of "I" statements to express their feelings without blaming others. This helps keep the conversation open and constructive.

• Instead of: "You're always so mean in the group chat!"
• Try: "I felt hurt when I read that comment in the group chat."

Parent Tip: Review their messages together (if appropriate and they are open to it) to help them practice phrasing their thoughts respectfully and clearly.

Why These Skills Matter

Teaching these skills helps your child:

• Understand others better: By asking for clarity, they learn to see different perspectives.
• Solve problems constructively: They gain tools to address issues rather than letting them fester.
• Maintain strong friendships: Healthy communication is the foundation of lasting relationships.

We encourage you to talk with your child about these A-B-C's and reinforce these valuable communication strategies at home. Together, we can help them navigate the complexities of digital friendships with confidence and kindness.

Sincerely,
[Teacher's Name]