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Friend in Need? Navigate the Nudge

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Maria Herrera

Tier 1
For Schools

Lesson Plan

Facilitator Guide with Protocol Flowchart

Students will identify at least five warning signs or risk factors, confidently use the Notice–Name–Navigate framework in a role-play, and accurately outline the exact steps to involve a trusted adult and school protocol, including how to proceed if the first adult is unavailable.

This lesson is crucial for empowering students to support their friends through difficult times. It equips them with practical skills to recognize warning signs, initiate supportive conversations, and connect friends to necessary help, ensuring their well-being and promoting a caring school community.

Audience

11th Grade

Time

45 minutes

Approach

Direct instruction, guided practice, and role-play.

Materials

Being a Helper While Getting Help, Signal Scan (Pre-Check Scenario Sort), Pre/Post Scenario-Based Check (5 Items), Scenario Check Key with Rationales, Role-Play Cards: Friend in Need, Referral Pathway Map (Who, Where, How), Confidentiality vs. Secrecy Circle, Notice–Name–Navigate Helper Script, Conversation Skills and Referral Accuracy Rubric, and Helper Self-Care Micro-Plan

Prep

Preparation Steps

15 minutes

  • Review all generated materials to familiarize yourself with the content.
    - Print one copy of Signal Scan (Pre-Check Scenario Sort) per student.
    - Print one set of Role-Play Cards: Friend in Need per small group (3-4 students).
    - Print one copy of Referral Pathway Map (Who, Where, How) per student.
    - Ensure access to the Being a Helper While Getting Help for presentation.

Step 1

Warm-Up & Norm-Setting

10 minutes

  • Distribute Signal Scan (Pre-Check Scenario Sort) and ask students to complete it individually.
    - Lead a brief class discussion on initial responses, prompting students to share common themes or challenges.
    - Introduce the concept of 'safety over secrecy' using the Confidentiality vs. Secrecy Circle as a visual aid to differentiate between healthy privacy and harmful secrecy.
    - Establish ground rules for sensitive discussions, emphasizing respect and active listening.

Step 2

Mini-Lesson: Notice–Name–Navigate

15 minutes

  • Present the Being a Helper While Getting Help, focusing on identifying warning signs, understanding risk factors, and introducing the three steps of the 'Notice–Name–Navigate' framework.
    - Model a short example conversation using key phrases from the Notice–Name–Navigate Helper Script.
    - Encourage questions and clarify any uncertainties regarding the framework.

Step 3

Guided Practice: Role-Play & Referral Mapping

15 minutes

  • Divide students into small groups (3-4 students per group).
    - Distribute one set of Role-Play Cards: Friend in Need and one copy of the Referral Pathway Map (Who, Where, How) to each student.
    - Instruct groups to select a card and practice the Notice–Name–Navigate framework, role-playing the conversation and mapping out the referral steps to a trusted adult and school protocol.
    - Circulate among groups to provide individualized feedback, using the Conversation Skills and Referral Accuracy Rubric as a guide for assessment.

Step 4

Wrap-Up & Self-Care

5 minutes

  • Administer the Pre/Post Scenario-Based Check (5 Items) to assess learning.
    - Conclude with the Helper Self-Care Micro-Plan activity, emphasizing the importance of self-care and seeking support when helping others.
    - Collect all student materials.
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Slide Deck

Being a Helper While Getting Help

Navigate the Nudge: Supporting Friends in Need

Welcome students and introduce the topic of supporting friends in need. Emphasize that this lesson is about empowering them with practical skills.

What We'll Learn Today

  • Identify warning signs and risk factors for friends in distress.\n- Use the 'Notice–Name–Navigate' framework to offer support.\n- Understand when and how to involve trusted adults and school protocols.\n- Practice self-care when helping others.

Read through the learning objectives. Clarify any terms as needed. Explain why these skills are important for their lives and friendships.

Notice: Warning Signs & Risk Factors

What changes might you notice in a friend?
- Behavioral Changes: Withdrawal, risky actions, changes in sleep/eating.\n- Emotional Shifts: Persistent sadness, anger, hopelessness, anxiety.\n- Academic Performance: Sudden drops in grades, lack of engagement.\n- Physical Signs: Neglect of hygiene, unexplained injuries, substance use.\n- Verbal Cues: Talking about feeling trapped, hopeless, or wanting to disappear.

Discuss common warning signs (changes in behavior, mood, appearance, etc.) and risk factors (stressors, past experiences). Ask students for examples they may have observed (without naming individuals).

Name: Starting the Conversation

How do you approach a friend with care and concern?
- Choose a Private Time: Find a quiet moment to talk.\n- Express Concern: Use 'I' statements (e.g., 'I've noticed...', 'I'm worried about...').\n- Listen Actively: Let your friend speak without interruption or judgment.\n- Validate Feelings: Acknowledge their emotions (e.g., 'That sounds really tough').\n- Avoid Blame: Focus on support, not fault.

Explain the 'Name' step
how to start a conversation with care and concern. Highlight the importance of 'I' statements and non-judgmental language. Refer to the Notice–Name–Navigate Helper Script.

Navigate: Connecting to Help

When is it time to involve others, and who?
- Trusted Adults: Parents, guardians, teachers, counselors, coaches, mentors.\n- School Protocols: School counselors, nurses, administrators.\n- Crisis Resources: 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline (call/text anytime).\n- Safety Over Secrecy: Your friend's safety is always the priority. Breaking confidentiality for safety is an act of care.

Explain the 'Navigate' step
when and how to get help. Emphasize that it's not about solving everything themselves, but connecting friends to resources. Discuss trusted adults and school protocols. Refer to Referral Pathway Map (Who, Where, How).

Safety Over Secrecy

Understanding the difference between confidentiality and secrecy.
- Confidentiality: Keeping private information private, when appropriate.\n- Secrecy: Hiding information that could be harmful to someone.\n- Your Role: When a friend's safety is at risk, your priority is to help them get support from a trusted adult. This is not betrayal; it's caring.

Reiterate the difference between confidentiality and secrecy using the Confidentiality vs. Secrecy Circle and reinforce that safety is paramount. It's okay to break a promise if someone's well-being is at risk.

Practice Time: Role-Play

Let's put 'Notice–Name–Navigate' into action!\n- Get into small groups.\n- Pick a Role-Play Card.\n- Practice the conversation using the Helper Script.\n- Fill out the Referral Pathway Map.\n- Remember to refer to the Rubric for effective communication.

Explain the role-play activity using Role-Play Cards: Friend in Need and Referral Pathway Map (Who, Where, How). Encourage students to use the script and rubric as guides. Provide clear instructions for group work.

Helper Self-Care: Don't Forget YOU!

Supporting others can be emotionally taxing. How can you take care of yourself?\n- Acknowledge Your Feelings: It's normal to feel stressed or worried.\n- Debrief with a Trusted Adult: Talk about your experience (while maintaining your friend's privacy).\n- Engage in Relaxing Activities: Hobbies, exercise, mindfulness.\n- Set Boundaries: You can't solve everything for everyone.\n- Complete your Helper Self-Care Micro-Plan!

Conclude by emphasizing the importance of self-care for helpers. Encourage them to reflect on their own well-being after supporting a friend. Introduce the Helper Self-Care Micro-Plan.

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Warm Up

Signal Scan: What Would You Do?

Instructions: Read each scenario below. For each scenario, decide if it describes a situation where you would typically:
A) Just listen and offer comfort.
B) Talk to your friend and encourage them to seek help.
C) Immediately tell a trusted adult because of safety concerns.

Circle your choice (A, B, or C) for each, and briefly explain why you chose that option.

---

Scenario 1: Your friend seems really down lately. They've been cancelling plans, stopped responding to group chats as much, and told you they're just feeling "blah" all the time.
Circle one: A / B / C
Why?





---

Scenario 2: A friend confides in you that they're struggling with really intense stress about school. They mention they haven't been sleeping and feel overwhelmed, but they also say they don't want to talk to anyone else because it's embarrassing.
Circle one: A / B / C
Why?





---

Scenario 3: You overhear your friend making comments like, "Sometimes I just wish I could disappear" and "No one would even care if I wasn't here." You know they've been going through a tough time at home.
Circle one: A / B / C
Why?





---

Scenario 4: Your friend has started experimenting with vaping and is trying to hide it from their parents. They ask you to keep it a secret, and you're worried they might get into bigger trouble or health issues.
Circle one: A / B / C
Why?





---

Scenario 5: A friend shows up to school with a new, deep cut on their arm, which they quickly try to cover. When you ask about it, they get defensive and say it's "nothing."
Circle one: A / B / C
Why?





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Quiz

Pre/Post Scenario-Based Check (5 Items)

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Answer Key

Scenario Check Key with Rationales

This answer key provides the correct responses and explanations for the Pre/Post Scenario-Based Check (5 Items).

---

### 1. Your friend, who is usually very outgoing, has stopped coming to after-school activities and rarely replies to your texts. When you see them, they avoid eye contact. What is the most important initial step you should take?

Correct Answer: C) Privately approach them to express your concern.

Rationale: The 'Notice' step involves observing changes in behavior. The 'Name' step involves expressing your concern directly but privately and kindly. Immediately telling a teacher without speaking to your friend first can sometimes alienate them, though it might be a necessary next step if they are unwilling to talk or if there's an immediate safety concern. Ignoring it or gossiping are unhelpful.

---

### 2. Your friend shares that they feel overwhelmed and sad most days and have lost interest in things they used to enjoy. Using the 'Name' step of the framework, which statement is the most appropriate way to respond?

Correct Answer: B) "I've noticed you seem really down, and I'm worried about you."

Rationale: This statement uses an "I" message, expresses genuine concern, and specifically names the observation without judgment, which is key to the 'Name' step. The other options are dismissive, prescriptive, or pushy, which can shut down the conversation.

---

### 3. A friend tells you they've been having thoughts of harming themselves, but they make you promise not to tell anyone. What is the most responsible action to take?

Correct Answer: C) Immediately tell a trusted adult, explaining the safety concern.

Rationale: This scenario highlights the principle of "safety over secrecy." When there are immediate safety concerns (like thoughts of self-harm), it is crucial to break confidentiality and involve a trusted adult to ensure the friend gets the necessary professional help. Keeping the promise in this instance would put your friend at significant risk.

---

### 4. List at least three different trusted adults or resources within your school or community that you could connect a friend to if they needed help.

Correct Answer (Examples): School counselor, school psychologist, school nurse, trusted teacher, coach, administrator, parent/guardian, 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, local mental health services, a religious leader, a trusted family member.

Rationale: The 'Navigate' step involves knowing who to turn to for help. Students should be aware of multiple avenues for support, both within the school and in the broader community, to ensure their friend can access the right resources.

---

### 5. You try to talk to your first choice of trusted adult (e.g., your school counselor), but they are unavailable. What is your next step to ensure your friend gets help?

Correct Answer: Find another trusted adult immediately (e.g., another teacher, administrator, nurse, parent/guardian, or call 988 if it's an emergency) until you can connect with someone who can provide help.

Rationale: This question tests the student's understanding of persistence and backup plans in the 'Navigate' step. It's important to emphasize that if the first attempt to get help is unsuccessful, they should not give up but seek out other available resources until the friend is safe and connected to support.

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Activity

Role-Play Cards: Friend in Need

Instructions: In your small groups, each member will take a turn being the 'Friend in Need' and the 'Helper.' Choose a card below and use the 'Notice–Name–Navigate' framework to practice the conversation and identify referral steps. Remember to be empathetic and supportive.

---

### Role-Play Card 1: The Withdrawn Artist

Friend in Need: You used to love art class and spent hours drawing. Lately, you've lost all motivation, your grades are slipping in other classes, and you just want to stay in bed. You feel hopeless and can't imagine things getting better, but you don't want to burden anyone.

Helper's Task: Practice 'Notice–Name–Navigate.' What specific changes have you 'noticed'? How will you 'name' your concern gently? What steps will you 'navigate' to get them help? Who are the trusted adults?

---

### Role-Play Card 2: The Overwhelmed Perfectionist

Friend in Need: You're a high achiever, but the pressure to get into a good college is crushing you. You've started having panic attacks, can't sleep, and are constantly worried about failing. You've also been skipping meals and feel like you're losing control. You're terrified of telling your parents because you think they'll be disappointed.

Helper's Task: Practice 'Notice–Name–Navigate.' What specific changes have you 'noticed'? How will you 'name' your concern without adding more pressure? What steps will you 'navigate' to get them help, considering their fear of disappointment? Who are the trusted adults?

---

### Role-Play Card 3: The Secret Sharer

Friend in Need: You've been cutting yourself when things get too much to handle. You've shown a trusted friend a fresh cut and made them promise not to tell anyone, saying you're fine and just needed to vent. You feel ashamed and scared.

Helper's Task: Practice 'Notice–Name–Navigate.' This scenario involves immediate safety concerns. How do you address the promise of secrecy while prioritizing safety? How will you 'name' your concern and then 'navigate' the situation to involve a trusted adult, even if it means breaking the promise? Who are the trusted adults?

---

### Role-Play Card 4: The Changing Friend

Friend in Need: Your behavior has become more reckless. You've started drinking alcohol regularly at parties, skipping classes, and getting into arguments with your family. You brush off concerns, saying, "I'm just having fun!" or "You're overreacting."

Helper's Task: Practice 'Notice–Name–Navigate.' How do you 'notice' these risky behaviors? How will you 'name' your concern when your friend is being defensive? What steps will you 'navigate' to address these behaviors and potential underlying issues, especially if your friend denies needing help? Who are the trusted adults?

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Worksheet

Referral Pathway Map: Getting Help for a Friend

Instructions: After discussing a scenario with your group or during your role-play, use this map to plan out how you would 'Navigate' getting help for your friend. Think about different options and backup plans.

---

### Scenario Summary:
(Briefly describe the friend's situation from your role-play card or a scenario you've discussed.)





---

### Step 1: Who is your first choice for a trusted adult or resource?
(Think about who is most appropriate and accessible.)

Name/Role:

Where can you find them? (e.g., office, classroom, home, phone)

How would you approach them? (What would you say?)





---

### Step 2: What is your backup plan if your first choice is unavailable or unhelpful?
(It's important to have other options!)

Backup Name/Role:

Where can you find them?

How would you approach them?





---

### Step 3: What is another additional resource (school or community-based) that might be helpful?
(Consider school counselors, nurses, administrators, or external crisis lines like 988.)

Resource Name:

How would you connect your friend to this resource?





---

### Step 4: What is the school protocol for reporting concerns about student well-being?
(Think about official steps, forms, or who to talk to in an emergency.)

Describe the protocol:





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### Step 5: If the situation is urgent and you can't reach a trusted adult immediately, what is an emergency resource you would use?

Emergency Contact/Resource:

How would you use it?





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Discussion

Confidentiality vs. Secrecy Circle: Where Do We Draw the Line?

Instructions for Teacher: Facilitate a discussion using the prompts below. Consider drawing two large, overlapping circles on a whiteboard or chart paper. Label one 'Confidentiality' and the other 'Secrecy.' As students offer ideas, write them in the appropriate circle or in the overlapping space. Emphasize that 'Safety Over Secrecy' is the guiding principle.

---

### Discussion Prompts:

1. Defining the Terms:
- What does it mean to keep something 'confidential'? When is confidentiality appropriate and helpful in a friendship?
- What does it mean to keep a 'secret'? When can secrets become harmful?

2. The Overlap (or lack thereof):
- Are there situations where you might promise to keep something confidential, but then realize it's actually a harmful secret?
- How do you decide if a friend's request for secrecy is putting them or someone else at risk?

3. Safety Over Secrecy:
- What does the phrase 'Safety Over Secrecy' mean to you in the context of helping a friend?
- Can you think of situations where breaking a promise of secrecy is actually an act of care and loyalty?
- How might a friend react if you break a harmful secret to get them help? How would you handle that reaction?

4. Real-Life Application:
- If a friend tells you they're struggling with something difficult (e.g., family problems, stress), but they're not in immediate danger, how might confidentiality play a role?
- If a friend talks about self-harm or hurting others, or tells you about abuse they are experiencing, how does 'Safety Over Secrecy' guide your actions?

5. Personal Boundaries:
- What are your own boundaries around keeping secrets for friends? What kind of information would you never keep secret if it meant someone's safety?

---

Key Takeaway: Confidentiality builds trust, but secrets can sometimes hide serious problems. When a friend's well-being or safety (or the safety of others) is at risk, prioritizing 'Safety Over Secrecy' is the most caring and responsible choice.

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Script

Notice–Name–Navigate Helper Script

Instructions for Teacher: This script provides sample language for students to use when practicing the 'Notice–Name–Navigate' framework. Encourage students to adapt it to their own voice and the specific scenario, focusing on the underlying principles of empathy, directness, and seeking help.

---

### Phase 1: NOTICE (Observing Changes)

* Helper's Internal Monologue/Observation: "I've been seeing some changes in [Friend's Name] lately. They usually [positive behavior], but now they're [changed behavior]. They also said [concerning statement]. I'm worried about them."

---

### Phase 2: NAME (Starting the Conversation - Empathetic & Direct)

Helper: "Hey [Friend's Name], do you have a few minutes to talk? I've noticed [specific observations, e.g., 'you haven't been coming to practice,' 'you seem quieter than usual,' 'you mentioned feeling really stressed out']. I care about you, and I'm a little worried. Is everything okay?"

* (Wait for Friend's Response - Listen Actively)

Friend (Possible Response 1: Denies/Minimizes): "I'm fine, don't worry about it."
Helper (Responding to Denial): "Okay, I hear you. But seriously, if anything is going on, I'm here for you, and I want you to know you're not alone. I'm still here to listen if you ever want to talk."

Friend (Possible Response 2: Opens Up Slightly): "No, not really. Things have been tough with [issue]."
Helper (Responding to Opening Up): "I'm sorry to hear that. That sounds really hard. Thanks for sharing with me. Can you tell me more about what's been going on?"

---

### Phase 3: NAVIGATE (Seeking Help - Collaborative & Supportive)

* (If the friend is in immediate danger or expresses thoughts of self-harm/harm to others, skip to involving a trusted adult immediately - Safety Over Secrecy!)

Helper: "It sounds like you're going through a lot. You don't have to carry this all by yourself. Have you thought about talking to someone who could help? Like [mention specific trusted adults - e.g., 'the school counselor,' 'a teacher you trust,' 'your parents']?"

Friend (Possible Response 1: Resists seeking help): "No, I don't want to talk to anyone. It's embarrassing/they won't understand/I don't want to get in trouble."
Helper (Responding to Resistance): "I understand why you might feel that way, but it's really brave to ask for help, and these people are there to support you, not judge you. What if we just thought about who might be helpful? We don't have to do anything right now, but just brainstorm?"
(If still resistant, gently reiterate your concern and the importance of getting help. If safety is a concern, move to contacting an adult.)*

Friend (Possible Response 2: Open to seeking help): "Maybe. Who do you think would be best?"
Helper (Facilitating Referral): "Well, [Trusted Adult's Name/Role] is really good at [specific positive quality, e.g., 'listening,' 'giving advice,' 'helping with tough situations']. We could even go talk to them together, if that would make it easier. Or, we could look up resources for [issue, e.g., 'stress management,' 'family support']."

Helper (If a trusted adult is involved): "Thank you for trusting me with this, [Friend's Name]. I'm going to reach out to [Trusted Adult's Name/Role] because I care about you and want to make sure you get the support you need. It's not about getting you in trouble, it's about getting you help."

---

### Remember:
- Listen more than you talk.
- Validate their feelings.
- You don't have to fix everything, just connect them to help.
- Prioritize Safety Over Secrecy.
- Take care of yourself too!

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Rubric

Conversation Skills and Referral Accuracy Rubric

Instructions: Use this rubric to assess students' performance during the role-play activity, focusing on their use of the 'Notice–Name–Navigate' framework and their ability to identify appropriate referral pathways. Assign points based on the descriptors for each criterion.

---

### Criteria 1: Noticing & Expressing Concern (The 'Notice' and beginning of 'Name' steps)

| Score | Description | Points
| :--- | :--- | :---
| 4 - Exemplary | Clearly identifies multiple specific warning signs/changes in behavior. Expresses concern empathetically, using "I" statements and non-judgmental language. | 4
| 3 - Proficient | Identifies most warning signs. Expresses concern with some empathy, using generally appropriate language. | 3
| 2 - Developing | Identifies some warning signs but may be vague. Expresses concern, but language might be slightly judgmental or less empathetic. | 2
| 1 - Beginning | Fails to identify clear warning signs or expresses concern inappropriately. | 1

---

### Criteria 2: Active Listening & Validation (Part of the 'Name' step)

| Score | Description | Points
| :--- | :--- | :---
| 4 - Exemplary | Listens attentively, allows friend to speak, asks clarifying questions, and validates feelings effectively. | 4
| 3 - Proficient | Listens well and validates feelings, but may occasionally interrupt or miss opportunities for deeper validation. | 3
| 2 - Developing | Attempts to listen but may interrupt frequently or struggle to validate feelings. | 2
| 1 - Beginning | Does not listen actively or dismisses friend's feelings. | 1

---

### Criteria 3: Navigating & Identifying Referral Pathways (The 'Navigate' step)

| Score | Description | Points
| :--- | :--- | :---
| 4 - Exemplary | Proactively suggests appropriate, specific trusted adults/resources. Demonstrates clear understanding of school protocol and backup plans. Prioritizes safety over secrecy when applicable. | 4
| 3 - Proficient | Suggests appropriate trusted adults/resources. Shows general understanding of school protocol and some backup planning. Generally prioritizes safety. | 3
| 2 - Developing | Identifies some resources but may be vague or miss key steps in the referral process. May struggle with balancing confidentiality and safety. | 2
| 1 - Beginning | Fails to identify appropriate resources or steps for getting help. Does not understand safety over secrecy. | 1

---

### Criteria 4: Overall Communication & Role-Play Engagement

| Score | Description | Points
| :--- | :--- | :---
| 4 - Exemplary | Communicates clearly, confidently, and respectfully throughout the role-play. Fully engaged and adapts well to the scenario. | 4
| 3 - Proficient | Communicates clearly and respectfully. Engaged in the role-play. | 3
| 2 - Developing | Communication is sometimes unclear or lacks respect. Engagement is inconsistent. | 2
| 1 - Beginning | Communication is ineffective, and there is minimal engagement in the role-play. | 1

---

Total Score: /16

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Cool Down

Helper Self-Care Micro-Plan

Instructions: Supporting a friend can be emotionally demanding. It's essential to take care of yourself too! Use this micro-plan to quickly jot down one or two things you can do to practice self-care after a challenging situation, or even just to maintain your well-being generally.

---

### 1. Acknowledge Your Feelings:
What emotions might you be feeling after helping a friend or discussing difficult topics?



---

### 2. My Go-To Self-Care Strategy (Quick & Easy):
What is ONE specific, quick activity you can do to help yourself feel grounded or recharged?
(Examples: Listen to a favorite song, take a few deep breaths, walk outside for 5 minutes, call a family member, play a quick game, stretch.)





---

### 3. My Support System:
Who is ONE trusted adult or friend you could talk to if you needed to debrief or needed support yourself (without sharing your friend's private details)?



---

### 4. Setting Boundaries (Optional Reflection):
What's one boundary you might need to set for yourself in the future to protect your own well-being while still being a supportive friend?





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Remember: You can't pour from an empty cup. Taking care of yourself allows you to be a more effective and sustainable helper for others.

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