Relationship-Building Strategy Bank

Objective: To collaboratively identify and share practical strategies for building positive, stable, and trusting relationships with students.

Instructions:

1. Work in small groups (3-4 participants).
2. Brainstorm strategies for each category below. Think about both general classroom practices and specific interactions with individual students.
3. Record your ideas in the spaces provided. Aim for at least 2-3 strategies per category.
4. Be prepared to share your group's best ideas with the whole group.

Category 1: Establishing a Secure Base

• How do you create a sense of safety and predictability for all students?
• What routines or consistent actions help students feel secure?

Category 2: Active Listening & Empathy in Action

• What specific phrases or non-verbal cues do you use to show students you are truly listening?
• How do you respond empathetically when a student is upset or struggling?

Category 3: Co-Regulation Techniques

• What strategies do you use to help students calm down when they are escalated?
• How do you model emotional regulation for your students?

Category 4: Building Trust with Adolescents

• What unique considerations do you have when building relationships with middle and high school students?
• How do you respect their growing autonomy while maintaining boundaries?

Category 5: General Connection Strategies

• What are some other creative ways you build rapport and connect with students on a daily basis?
• Think about humor, shared interests, or informal check-ins.

Challenging Interactions Role-Play Cards

Objective: To practice applying connection before correction strategies in common challenging student interaction scenarios.

Instructions for Groups:

1. Divide into small groups of 3-4 participants.
2. Assign roles: One person will be the "Teacher," one will be the "Student," and one or two will be the "Observer(s)."
3. Choose a card: Select one scenario card to role-play.
4. Role-Play: The "Teacher" should attempt to use "Connection Before Correction" strategies to de-escalate the situation and build connection. The "Student" should act out the scenario as described.
5. Observe and Reflect: The "Observer(s)" will watch closely for effective strategies and areas for growth. After the role-play, discuss the following:
   • What strategies did the "Teacher" use effectively to connect?
   • How did the "Student" (role-player) feel during the interaction?
   • What alternative approaches could have been used?
   • What did you learn about applying connection before correction?
6. Switch roles and repeat with a new scenario card.

Scenario Card 1: The Disengaged Teen

Student: A high school student (Liam) has his head down on his desk, earbuds in, and is completely ignoring your lesson. He hasn't turned in homework for a week.

Teacher Goal: Get Liam engaged and understand what's going on, without immediately resorting to a disciplinary tone.

Scenario Card 2: The Emotional Outburst

Student: A middle school student (Maya) suddenly shouts, "This is stupid! I hate this class!" after you give instructions for a group project. Her face is flushed.

Teacher Goal: De-escalate Maya's emotions, understand the root cause, and re-engage her, while maintaining classroom order.

Scenario Card 3: The Argumentative Child

Student: An elementary school student (Chloe) is loudly arguing with another student about a shared toy. When you approach, she turns her frustration towards you, saying, "It's not fair! You always take their side!"

Teacher Goal: Calm Chloe, address the conflict, and rebuild trust, without getting drawn into an argument.

Scenario Card 4: The "I Don't Care" Student

Student: A student (Jayden) consistently responds with "I don't care" or shrugs when asked about their work, behavior, or feelings, even when it's clear they are struggling.

Teacher Goal: Break through Jayden's apparent apathy to establish a connection and understand what might be behind their responses.

Scenario Card 5: The Anxious Avoidant

Student: A student (Sarah) frequently asks to go to the nurse or bathroom right before challenging assignments or presentations. She appears anxious and avoids eye contact.

Teacher Goal: Connect with Sarah to understand her anxiety and offer support, helping her feel safe enough to participate.

Scenario Card 6: The Rule-Breaker (Minor)

Student: A student (Diego) is caught secretly using his phone to text during independent work time, despite clear classroom rules against it.

Teacher Goal: Address the rule-breaking while prioritizing connection and understanding the underlying reason for his action, rather than just imposing a punishment.

My Relational Commitment Worksheet

Objective: To reflect on the strategies discussed and commit to actionable steps for strengthening relationships with students.

Instructions:

Take a moment to reflect on today's session. Consider the key concepts of a secure base, co-regulation, active listening, empathy, predictability, and building trust. Think about your own students and your classroom environment.

1. What was your biggest "Aha!" moment or key takeaway from this session?

2. Identify one specific student (or a type of student) with whom you want to intentionally strengthen your relationship. What makes this relationship challenging or what makes you want to focus on it?

3. Based on today's discussion, choose two concrete strategies you will commit to implementing in your classroom or interactions with students in the next week. Be specific!

Strategy 1:

• How will you implement it?
• When will you try it?

Strategy 2:

• How will you implement it?
• When will you try it?

4. What potential challenges might you face in implementing these strategies, and how might you overcome them?

5. What positive impact do you hope to see in your students and your classroom as a result of these relational commitments?

"When we seek to understand rather than to be understood, we open the door to true connection."